Conflict Management

A disagreement that my husband and I often argue about is how "rowdy" our boys can be inside the house.  It may seem like a simple, not that big of a deal issue, however, it leads to frustration on my part, confusion on the boys, and who knows what with my husband!  My husband has a high level of tolerance for noise and active play, where I have a much lower tolerance and tell them to go outside.  My perspective is that they can play without being so loud and rough, I have school work to do, bills to organize, work that at times is brought home, etc. that requires a degree of quietness.  My husband, on the other hand, leaves work at work and does not have the other household responsibilities (besides helping with cleaning and the kids, which I greatly appreciate, but those don't require quietness!). 

I believe that the best strategy, which we have already discussed, would be to negotiate a routine that allows for both rough and rowdy play and also a time when that kind of play is finished for the night.  I listened to the boys and him when they talked about being at school all day and work, especially since my oldest son is diagnosed with ADHD and I truly believe my husband has it too!!!!  LOL  We have put into place a win-win situation where if I have work to finish, I may stay at work 1/2 hour later and complete it there rather than bringing it home.  Honestly, I loved that idea, it is nice to not have to worry about work at family time.  We also keep the TV off, not even as background noise, until 7pm, which is when everyone gets ready for bed and settles in with TV or electronics until bed.  After the kids are settled, I am them able to start the house responsibilities with little distractions. 

This certainly has decreased the frustration and confusion for all.  I would like to ask colleagues, however, what do you do when the other person is not willing to put into place the communication/conflict resolution strategies?  I believe that both sides need to be flexible, open, and willing to give, but we all have met people that are truly "stuck in their ways" and will not budge.  Then what?  Do you just give in?  Ignore them and choose not to communicate with them as much as possible?  Since taking these courses, I truly have been observing people and find myself getting frustrated with those in my family that are so set in their ways and no matter how much you use questioning, try for them to see other sides, or for them to accept true facts, they don't budge.  HELP!!!!!!  Not that I lose sleep over it, but it does get annoying at times.